So much is going on right now that leaves me unsettled. I have this sense that something large is going to happen soon... Something I don't want to happen... something that will cause this entire thing to blow up in my face. I don't exactly know what or when but i'm left feeling this impending doom. Things feel so fractured right now and i just desperately want things to be patched back together...
Faith and Hope
Two weeks ago Richie and I went in for our routine 20 week sonogram. We were excited to see her but since we already knew she was a girl, we weren't expecting any surprises. But a surprise is what we got. During the sonogram nothing really was said about any issues. She wasn't really cooperating by showing us between her legs just to confirm that she was a girl. She was laying on her side with the cord between her legs and no amount of jiggling or prodding by the doctor would get her to move. And he was trying really hard to move her. I remember at one point he was recording the blood flow of the cord and the screen goes a different color. It's supposed to be this Doppler looking thing (like you see on the weather channel) and the cord is supposed to turn red and blue. I remember it turning red and blue but it wasn't consistent and the color would stop and then it would flash up again. I think it's supposed to s...
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