morning sickness is no laughing matter

It's crazy how you can feel perfectly fine one moment and then sick as a dog the next....  Morning sickness has struck here in the Rollins household...  I was up each morning for the last 3 mornings with a large lump in my throat and swallowing anything makes me feel like gaging....  I can usually manage a few bites of something and every so often i take a few more bites and try not to gag.  I always try to go back to sleep but if I can't sleep i usually lay on the couch like a bum...  This is where you can find me until about 1 or 2.  By then my body has stopped boycotting food and i can manage to eat a small lunch.  I feel pretty good until bedtime but i still have waves of sickness.  It's so weird how you can feel right as rain and two seconds later you swear that you are going to throw up. 

We went to our first Dr. appointment and it was still surreal.  I was literally sitting there thinking omg what if they Dr comes in and tells me that I've made the whole thing up and that I'm not really pregnant.  Maybe i have that freak disease where you want a baby so much your body has symptoms of pregnancy without actually being so.  I KNOW I KNOW I'M NEUROTIC.  But all went well and the baby is the size of a dime but you can see the sack and the tiny white blob in the middle is a baby.  At some angles you can even see the tiny flickering of a beating heart.  It was amazing.  And mind blowing to think that deep inside of me is this tiny baby - a baby with a beating heart! 


Richie was pretty quiet during the process.  Later on he said that he said that he was just relieved that it was only one baby and NOT twins...   lol.... but he also said that it was hard to see anything or tell what anything is.  I agree. 

He has been so attentive and sweet lately.  He makes me oatmeal and rubs my back when I'm not feeling good.  He went and got me Ginger ale and soda crackers this AM.  He asks me a million times a day if I'm OK or if i need anything.  I think it must be weird for him to see me just laying here day after day.  He must feel a little helpless not to be able to magically fix it and make me feel 100% better.  As we speak he is getting us dinner because i didn't feel like actually sitting at the restaurant to eat.  On the way up there he called because he knew my gas was low so he was going to fill it up.  It makes me even more thankful to have found such a wonderful guy to spend my life with.  Even if the other day while trying to make me feel better he said "just remember you wanted this."  When you are trying not to puke those are NOT exactly the words you want to hear.  I didn't have a very nice response.  :o)  For the most part he is pretty amazing.  I couldn't ask for anything better.   

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