drama mama
My entire life I've been as healthy as a horse. I have only broken one bone (a finger), had stitches once (from a mole removal) and never had a surgery. I'd only been in hospitals for other people and never been a patient myself. So I assumed that since I was relatively healthy in general, I would have a relatively healthy pregnancy. I never thought I would have a pregnancy that was filled with such drama. (And for those of you thinking that it could be much worse - I agree.... It could be, but I'm just speaking as to how I feel right now. Please don't tell me that so and so had it much worse in an attempt to make me feel better. That makes me feel like you are trivializing my experiences and emotions. Anyways - I digress.)
It all started the other night. I got up in the middle of the night to pee - nothing new there. Richie had stayed up later than normal and it was actually him coming to bed that woke me up. This is when I noticed that I was bleeding. This is not exactly a sight you want to see at any time during a pregnancy but most especially NOT at 2am. I yelled for Richie, who ran into the bathroom super fast, and his face immediately went white. His first question was "Is that normal?" and my response was "ummm I doubt it". I was trying to remain calm but my mind was racing. In my haste to call my Dr., I accidentally dialed the wrong Dr. The overnight nurse was as confused as I was. Turns out i have two male Asian doctors in my phone - one an internist and one an OBGYN - and I was calling the wrong one.... lol ooppps...
When the on-call Dr. called back (not my actual Dr.) I told her my symptoms. But again in my crazed state of mind I wasn't very clear and she didn't ask to clarify any of my statements. So I gave her half of the story and she didn't ask for any other symptoms i might have had. She basically told me to drink a glass of water and go back to bed. HA. Yeah right. Just lay back down and go back to bed like nothing happened. Needless to say I didn't sleep AT ALL. I sat up the rest of the night counting down to when the Dr. office was open so i could talk to MY doctor. By this time my mind had cleared somewhat and I realized that I had forgotten to tell her a few symptoms that probably went with the bleeding. So by the time I got a hold of my Dr.'s nurse she said "o yes you definitely need to come in ASAP." So Richie and I drove out to 281 to see our Dr.
When we got there, he walked in and said "Lauren! I'm so glad to see you. I was worried when i read my on-call notes this AM." That immediately made me feel so much better - I really, really like my Dr. He heard my story and then said "Why didn't you go immediately to Labor and Delivery?" to which i felt better and worse at the same time as i told him what the other Dr. had said. He did an exam and said "well we need to do a sonogram but he's busy right now. Go to the waiting room for about 15 minutes until he is ready. But you should probably clear your schedule for the day. I'll be sending you over to labor and delivery after that."
I would have to say that until then it all felt pretty surreal but now full blown panic set in. We sat down in the waiting room and for the second time this pregnancy I was crying in the waiting room. I didn't really know what he meant by checking into labor and delivery. I didn't know what was wrong and honestly i have an overactive imagination that tends to immediately go to the worst case scenario possible when i don't have all the details of a situation. So i was in that state of O-M-G what is wrong with me and the baby. I was feeling Luke move so I knew that he was safe for now. But i thought what if i have to deliver Luke today??? We have absolutely nothing done and he's still 11 weeks from being fully grown. Like I said - full blown panic and little sleep don't really make for a logical brain.
They finally called my name for the sonogram and the technician - bless his awkward little heart - tried to be more talkative to calm me some. He talked more than I've ever heard him talk. Luke's heart rate was normal and he is 3 lbs 1 oz. We were also informed that he has large hands and feet. lol no shock considering the size feet we have on my side of the family. He also said that it looked pretty good mostly except the amniotic fluid which was low. Then my Dr. came into the sonogram room and talked all technical with the sonogram guy as they looked at a few more things. My Dr. told me he was sending me over to L and D because he was worried about placenta abruption and also that i was leaking amniotic fluid. He assured me that they knew I was coming and that they knew what tests to run and that he would check in on me before he left for the night, but i should plan on staying in the hospital overnight.
At this point Richie and I walked down the hall to the L and D (the Dr. Office is actually a wing in the hospital). Richie didn't say very much the entire time. He just held my hand. At one point when I was in the triage area he left to call his parents and also his work. When he came back he was still pretty pale. I can't imagine how he felt seeing me laid up in a hospital bed and knowing that once again he could not do anything to help me or Luke. Poor guy. When I asked him about work he said he called and told them he wouldn't be in the next day and that they gave him the rest of the week off. I said "wow that was nice of them" considering he works retail and black friday is a huge deal for them and he said "well i kinda freaked out on the phone". He didn't really say what that entailed but I could tell he had been crying. Poor guy! Breaks my heart when he cries.
To make a long story short they ran some tests, did a second ultrasound that day and finally around 6pm came back with the results. My placenta had torn away from the uterine wall a little bit (placenta abruption) which was why i had the bleeding. However, the bleeding had stopped, and I would be allowed to go home the next day if my amniotic fluid was at an acceptable level. After a pretty sleepless night for Richie and I, they did a 3rd ultrasound and determined that although my amniotic fluid was at the lowest end of the normal range it was much higher than it was the day before. So they let me go home with strict bed rest instructions. I can only get up to go to the bathroom, shower, or to walk to a table to eat meals. Other than that, I have to be sitting or laying down on the couch or bed. At least until November 30th and then my Dr. will re-evaluate me.
Before he discharged me, my Dr. said two things that kinda scared me. He said that the amount of bleeding I had was definitely not normal and if it happens again i should come in immediately to L and D. He also said that if it happens again, that I would be put in the hospital for the remainder of my pregnancy. No bueno.
So here I am at home on the couch. Holding down the fort.
It hasn't been so bad yet because Richie is here and can get things for me or help me stay entertained. I am kinda worried about when he goes back to work on Saturday. My mom and Richie put up the Christmas decorations so I'm able to look at those and feel comfort in my cozy little house. This is DEFINITELY a lesson for me on asking for help and accepting help. I am such an extremely independent woman that i rarely (if ever) asked for help. I was raised that I can do anything I want - I just have to work for it. Which is an amazing lesson to learn. But I think my Type A personality has taken that to the extreme. Several times in my life people have asked me "why didn't you ask for help? I could have done it." It's just not in my nature. But I'm learning it. I'm learning that I have to slow down. I live life at such a frantic pace that I don't really know how to relax. So I'm learning that too. I'm also learning that just because Richie does things in a different way doesn't make it a bad way. And lastly, I'm learning that my house doesn't have to be in tip top perfect condition. This one is hard with my OCD.
So it's been a learning experience all around. Once again, motherhood is teaching me that I can plan things out all I want but that things don't always go according to plan. All I can say is that I hope the drama is over and that the next 11 weeks are very, very quiet and that labor goes smoothly. I don't know how much more drama this mama can take.
It all started the other night. I got up in the middle of the night to pee - nothing new there. Richie had stayed up later than normal and it was actually him coming to bed that woke me up. This is when I noticed that I was bleeding. This is not exactly a sight you want to see at any time during a pregnancy but most especially NOT at 2am. I yelled for Richie, who ran into the bathroom super fast, and his face immediately went white. His first question was "Is that normal?" and my response was "ummm I doubt it". I was trying to remain calm but my mind was racing. In my haste to call my Dr., I accidentally dialed the wrong Dr. The overnight nurse was as confused as I was. Turns out i have two male Asian doctors in my phone - one an internist and one an OBGYN - and I was calling the wrong one.... lol ooppps...
When the on-call Dr. called back (not my actual Dr.) I told her my symptoms. But again in my crazed state of mind I wasn't very clear and she didn't ask to clarify any of my statements. So I gave her half of the story and she didn't ask for any other symptoms i might have had. She basically told me to drink a glass of water and go back to bed. HA. Yeah right. Just lay back down and go back to bed like nothing happened. Needless to say I didn't sleep AT ALL. I sat up the rest of the night counting down to when the Dr. office was open so i could talk to MY doctor. By this time my mind had cleared somewhat and I realized that I had forgotten to tell her a few symptoms that probably went with the bleeding. So by the time I got a hold of my Dr.'s nurse she said "o yes you definitely need to come in ASAP." So Richie and I drove out to 281 to see our Dr.
When we got there, he walked in and said "Lauren! I'm so glad to see you. I was worried when i read my on-call notes this AM." That immediately made me feel so much better - I really, really like my Dr. He heard my story and then said "Why didn't you go immediately to Labor and Delivery?" to which i felt better and worse at the same time as i told him what the other Dr. had said. He did an exam and said "well we need to do a sonogram but he's busy right now. Go to the waiting room for about 15 minutes until he is ready. But you should probably clear your schedule for the day. I'll be sending you over to labor and delivery after that."
I would have to say that until then it all felt pretty surreal but now full blown panic set in. We sat down in the waiting room and for the second time this pregnancy I was crying in the waiting room. I didn't really know what he meant by checking into labor and delivery. I didn't know what was wrong and honestly i have an overactive imagination that tends to immediately go to the worst case scenario possible when i don't have all the details of a situation. So i was in that state of O-M-G what is wrong with me and the baby. I was feeling Luke move so I knew that he was safe for now. But i thought what if i have to deliver Luke today??? We have absolutely nothing done and he's still 11 weeks from being fully grown. Like I said - full blown panic and little sleep don't really make for a logical brain.
They finally called my name for the sonogram and the technician - bless his awkward little heart - tried to be more talkative to calm me some. He talked more than I've ever heard him talk. Luke's heart rate was normal and he is 3 lbs 1 oz. We were also informed that he has large hands and feet. lol no shock considering the size feet we have on my side of the family. He also said that it looked pretty good mostly except the amniotic fluid which was low. Then my Dr. came into the sonogram room and talked all technical with the sonogram guy as they looked at a few more things. My Dr. told me he was sending me over to L and D because he was worried about placenta abruption and also that i was leaking amniotic fluid. He assured me that they knew I was coming and that they knew what tests to run and that he would check in on me before he left for the night, but i should plan on staying in the hospital overnight.
At this point Richie and I walked down the hall to the L and D (the Dr. Office is actually a wing in the hospital). Richie didn't say very much the entire time. He just held my hand. At one point when I was in the triage area he left to call his parents and also his work. When he came back he was still pretty pale. I can't imagine how he felt seeing me laid up in a hospital bed and knowing that once again he could not do anything to help me or Luke. Poor guy. When I asked him about work he said he called and told them he wouldn't be in the next day and that they gave him the rest of the week off. I said "wow that was nice of them" considering he works retail and black friday is a huge deal for them and he said "well i kinda freaked out on the phone". He didn't really say what that entailed but I could tell he had been crying. Poor guy! Breaks my heart when he cries.
 |
| This is a terrible picture but the only one from being in the hospital |
To make a long story short they ran some tests, did a second ultrasound that day and finally around 6pm came back with the results. My placenta had torn away from the uterine wall a little bit (placenta abruption) which was why i had the bleeding. However, the bleeding had stopped, and I would be allowed to go home the next day if my amniotic fluid was at an acceptable level. After a pretty sleepless night for Richie and I, they did a 3rd ultrasound and determined that although my amniotic fluid was at the lowest end of the normal range it was much higher than it was the day before. So they let me go home with strict bed rest instructions. I can only get up to go to the bathroom, shower, or to walk to a table to eat meals. Other than that, I have to be sitting or laying down on the couch or bed. At least until November 30th and then my Dr. will re-evaluate me.
Before he discharged me, my Dr. said two things that kinda scared me. He said that the amount of bleeding I had was definitely not normal and if it happens again i should come in immediately to L and D. He also said that if it happens again, that I would be put in the hospital for the remainder of my pregnancy. No bueno.
So here I am at home on the couch. Holding down the fort.
 |
| again a terrible picture but if you aren't leaving the house why get all fancied up?? |
It hasn't been so bad yet because Richie is here and can get things for me or help me stay entertained. I am kinda worried about when he goes back to work on Saturday. My mom and Richie put up the Christmas decorations so I'm able to look at those and feel comfort in my cozy little house. This is DEFINITELY a lesson for me on asking for help and accepting help. I am such an extremely independent woman that i rarely (if ever) asked for help. I was raised that I can do anything I want - I just have to work for it. Which is an amazing lesson to learn. But I think my Type A personality has taken that to the extreme. Several times in my life people have asked me "why didn't you ask for help? I could have done it." It's just not in my nature. But I'm learning it. I'm learning that I have to slow down. I live life at such a frantic pace that I don't really know how to relax. So I'm learning that too. I'm also learning that just because Richie does things in a different way doesn't make it a bad way. And lastly, I'm learning that my house doesn't have to be in tip top perfect condition. This one is hard with my OCD.
So it's been a learning experience all around. Once again, motherhood is teaching me that I can plan things out all I want but that things don't always go according to plan. All I can say is that I hope the drama is over and that the next 11 weeks are very, very quiet and that labor goes smoothly. I don't know how much more drama this mama can take.
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